gold:

if you think you’ve ever once said anything awkward you should know my health teacher once said “sex isn’t that great” and i blurted out “because you’re not doing it with me” and everyone stared at me

119,287 notes

mutisija:

nipple is a bad word. say “sensitive chest raisin” instead

207,330 notes

  • Waitress: do you have any questions about the menu?
  • Me: what kind of font is this?

226,613 notes

nuemonic:

"be strong," I whispered to my wifi signal

365 notes

lacigreen:

farfromthepacific:

cigarettesandwaffles:

me, if you use those fingers correctly.

omg I almost spit out the water I was drinking 

a million gallons of fun

lacigreen:

farfromthepacific:

cigarettesandwaffles:

me, if you use those fingers correctly.

omg I almost spit out the water I was drinking 

a million gallons of fun

496,939 notes

kuroenigma:

echobo:

lasagna is just spaghetti flavored cake

image

166,954 notes

kuroenigma:

echobo:

lasagna is just spaghetti flavored cake

image

166,954 notes

memewhore:

bearsatan:

what

My brain fizzled on the last one.

(Source: iraffiruse)

23,968 notes

memewhore:

bearsatan:

what

My brain fizzled on the last one.

(Source: iraffiruse)

23,968 notes